The Darker Side of Putting Yourself Out There Online

Hello everyone, 

Recently, I have been asking everyone I know to report an Instagram account, that is currently pretending to be me. 

When I was first made aware of the account, I initially found it amusing and and took it as a sign that I had ‘made it.’ 

The account has me blocked so that I cannot see them or report it myself, but I have been informed by friends & family who were given access to follow it, that they have done a variation of my username and copied my bio, and started reposting my grid posts.

 

Whilst this is something that I personally am able to laugh off and not worry about too much, conversations with friends who aren’t as ‘out there’ online, prompted me to consider how this might make someone feel who wasn’t as thick-skinned and media-hardened as me.

Now that I think about it, it actually is very unnerving that someone (who I may or may not know in real life, they could be anywhere in the world) has taken the time of day to create a new account, block me so that I can’t see/do anything about it, copy & paste my pictures and captions and follow / DM my friends and family.

 

As well as being creepy and invasive, it could also be quite intimidating, and all of this has got me thinking about the potential real-world consequences that could arise for myself and other women who put themselves out there on social media.

 

I want to preface what I say next with the fact that the responsibility of keeping safe should NOT be solely on women.  

 

Someone attacking / harassing / stalking YOU, is entirely their fault. Victims of this are in no way ever responsible for the actions of their attacker.

 

In light of this, something I am now very aware of and no longer do is post my live location online. I used to post Instagram stories / grid posts whilst out and about & on the move, but I no longer do this after a friend of mine had an incident where a stranger arrived unannounced to an event that he saw she was attending online.

Whilst fortunately nothing happened and he was simply escorted out of the venue by the security team, it brought home the reality for me that not everyone who follows me online necessarily has the best intentions.

 

I always record / take photos when I’m out, and either save them to my Instagram drafts until I get home, or I’ll just take photos and videos on my phone camera and don’t even create the stories until I’m home.

 

I know I’m not Kim Kardashian, or realistically well-known enough by anyone to be a victim of anything like this but after this exact thing happened to someone I know, I’ve decided I would rather not let people know where exactly I am & when.

 

I’ve had friends of mine in similar situations where they had fake accounts pretending to be them pop up online. And I must admit, I never thought about how much of a violation it is until I talked to my non-blogger friends about it.

 

Upon further consideration, I must admit that I’m mortified to think of what what this person could be saying / sending to people whilst pretending to be me.

 

This train of thought did made me consider stripping back my online presence, making my accounts private or even deleting them altogether and creating new private ones. 

 

I quickly decided against this because I felt that this would be giving in to exactly what the people who do this want & would be against my nature, I am not willing to shrink myself (online or in real life) because of one outlier trying to intimidate me (most likely from their mother’s basement)

 

I have had the most incredible opportunities arise from the growth of my blog and my Instagram & TikTok accounts. I have been invited to restaurant openings, Blogger’s Brunches, and even brand deals as a result of being a content creator, which I could not be more delighted about.

 

As well as these glamorous perks, I also thoroughly enjoy it. Writing my blog and creating content on TikTok & Instagram is one of my favourite hobbies, and I’m not willing to give any of it up because someone, who isn’t even brave enough to let me see it, is trying to impersonate me (which is honestly just fan behaviour anyway) .

 

At the time of writing, this account is still active (I get friends and family to check on it for me), and I would be very grateful if anyone reading this would please go to Instagram and report the account @_belfastmediagirl (I’m @BelfastMediaGirl, no underscore or punctuation 🤍) 

 

I would like to end this blog on a positive note that I wish all of my fellow content creators & Instagram Girlies the best of luck, and safety, online. 

 

With love (and resilience),

 

Stacey Xx