Ethically Including a Sex Scene in Your Student Short - My Experience

The recent popularity of BBC3’s Normal People, and all the chatter about the amount of sex scenes featured, led to a local industry discussion (Normal People was based and shot in Ireland) about intimacy coordination and the guidelines that should be followed.

This reminded me of when I was producing my final year film at Uni, No Refunds, which included a brief sex scene between the main character and his wife, it was a short sequence (3 shots) where only one shot required partial nudity and the actors to actually be in an intimate position with each other, and as a young producer, the ethical and logistic co-ordination of this scene presented a whole array of challenges. 

The scene takes place on the characters’ wedding night, and had no visible genitalia or female nipple, and a translucent curtain concealed the actors from the camera during the most ‘graphic’ shot.

My director, Chezdan Mills, and I attended several meetings with our supervising lecturer (Jayne Sayer), who had recently attended a seminar at the London Short Film Festival held by Ita O’Brien (the intimacy coordinator for Normal People and Sex Education).

Jayne advised us and guided me in how to put together a set of guidelines to ensure the scene was produced as professionally and ethically as possible. 

These are the tips I would give to anyone who wants to produce a sex scene in an independent film:

Priorities

The first, and most important, thing to remember when producing an intimacy scene, is to remember that your actors’ safety and wellbeing is paramount. As producer you have a duty of care for the health and safety of those on your set. If your actor requests to take a break or stop filming you should do so without question. The footage you’re hoping to get is NOT more important than the emotional and mental wellbeing of your actors.

Choreography 

Every single movement within the scene must be choreographed and consented upon by the actors prior to filming. There should be no room for improvisation when it comes to the shooting of the scene. Actors should feel free to suggest alternative movements they feel more comfortable with, but this should all be discussed and consented upon by all participants in the scene.

Meetings with the director, producer, and actors should be held prior to filming to go over the choreography of the scene, what they’ll be expected to wear (or not wear), and what will be visible on camera and off camera (to the crew) and the director should provide sketches of each movement/part of the choreography and how it will appear on camera (storyboards).

During this meeting is the time to ask your actors if they have any insecurities/things they specifically want to keep private on set etc. scars, stretch marks, cellulite, stoma bag, insulin pump. If they do flag something like this, you can figure out a way to accommodate this (and you absolutely should without question) prior to filming.

Intimacy Co Ordinator’s

The role of intimacy co ordinator is to watch the actors, throughout the filming of this scene, for any sign of distress and discomfort and call for a break on their behalf if necessary. Their entire role that day is to ensure the actors feel safe and comfortable and watch for any changes to this, as well as ensure the crew are adhering to all of the guidelines and responsibility they have to the safety and wellbeing of the actors.

During this meeting is also the time to ask each actor whether or not they would prefer to elect a friend/family member to act as an intimacy co Ordinator during the filming of this scene. The benefit of them choosing someone from outside the company (by ‘company’ I mean my film crew) is that they are more biased to the actor’s wellbeing than they are to whether or not the crew ‘get the shots.’ 

The actor may also feel less ‘outnumbered’ by crew and more empowered to flag any discomfort/distress with someone they are close to being onside.

In my experience, both actors expressed that they would feel uncomfortable electing someone from outside the company to act as intimacy co Ordinator and would prefer that I acted as intimacy co Ordinator on set during the filming of this scene.

Documentation

As well as a standard health and safety risk assessment, I also drew up a thorough Mental and Emotional Wellbeing risk assessment that prioritised the emotional safety of our actors and mapped out the steps we as a company were taking to ensure this.

In this risk assessment you need to not only consider physical elements (such as ensuring a modesty barrier is in place between the actors so they aren’t directly on top of each other, should a physical reaction occur that could cause embarrassment and distress), but also emotional elements, certain aspects of the choreography could trigger a repressed memory of sexual assault or the actor may simply become distressed and overwhelmed on the day.

The provision of this document and the preventative steps we were taking to prevent distress and discomfort on the day to our actors prior to filming also serves to make them feel that the situation is completely under control and likely the prioritisation of their wellbeing will make them feel a lot safer on your set.

As well as the standard contributor forms/NDA’s, I also drew up a separate intimacy scene contract, which mapped out exactly what was expected of the actors, as well as what they could expect of us. It mapped out all of our guidelines and also held us, as a company legally responsible for upholding our end of the bargain (acting on all of these listed guidelines/tips, which were listed in the document) in keeping them safe.

Proper behaviour/vocabulary on set

Any references to the actor’s anatomy must only be when absolutely necessary and strictly in medical terms (side breast, buttock, etc.) To refer to the actor’s movement within the scene, ‘animal’ terms should be used, e.g. ‘snake-like movement.’

Professional conduct by all crew members is paramount on the shoot day of an intimate scene, at no point throughout the day of or shooting of the intimate scene should any crew member make a lewd joke in attempt to ‘lift the tension.’ The actors are likely feeling quite nervous and anxious, everyone on set should be sensitive to this and not risk potentially making them uncomfortable.

Closed set with minimal crew present

 The only people on set for No Refunds intimate scene were myself, the director and the DOP. This is to avoid unnecessary eyes on the actors during this scene, they already feel exposed so being outnumbered and stared at by non-essential crew could cause unnecessary pressure and discomfort.

The director was on set to direct the scene and ensure the footage turned out exactly as he wanted, he was essential. I was on set as Producer, I was in charge of the logistics and health and safety of the production of this scene and the actors expressed that they preferred I act as intimacy coordinator than invite their own coordinator on set, so I was essential. After discussion with the actors, they voiced their preference for the DOP to be on set so that the scene could be completed as quickly and effectively as possible, so he was essential.

Limited Distribution

Limited distribution covers who has access to the raw footage of the intimacy scene after it’s shot. Under limited distribution, this would mean only myself (producer), the director and the editor were allowed to have this footage backed up and view it. Once the footage is edited and inserted into the timeline of the film, the company were free to show it (as part of an edited sequence in the film) to any crew member/outsider they deem necessary, as it is now the sequence that will be shown to audiences.

However once these takes/shots are selected and inserted into the timeline, any and all raw footage and it’s copies of this scene must be destroyed. Only backups of the edited sequence are allowed. This is to prevent the raw footage being reviewed unnecessarily outside out of its intended purpose, or worst-case scenario, being leaked.

This again is in the best interest of the actors as body parts, which we are contracted to have on tape, may be visible during the setup of the take as they get into position. Limited distribution protects not only the actor, but the company as well. 

One thing I really have to stress, is that I am NOT an expert or regulatory body when it comes to the nature of producing an intimate scene, these are just my tips and the guidelines that I followed when I was the producer in charge of one. 

For more information you should check out Ita’s website where she has the set of guidelines I based mine off in more detail, and consider taking one of her courses if it’s in your budget.

I hope this has been a helpful interesting insight into my practice and process of ethically producing a sex scene in a student film!